We have something so special and near and dear to our hearts to share today. This furniture makeover by our friend Lindsey has so much meaning. Lindsey lost her boyfriend, and our friend, Damon last September to suicide. A word that seems almost impossible to type. It’s been hard to fathom. Difficult to understand why a loving God would let that happen. Hard to watch someone experience the worst day of their life. The silver lining is that with each day that goes by we get to see life and spirit renewed. We have seen the definition of family as her parents and sister surrounded her with unwavering love. We have covered their family in prayer and have relentlessly asked God to please wrap his hands around them…The bible tells us God can hold all the oceans of the world in the creases of his hands so I know he has them cradled in there somewhere.

The first time I met Lindsey’s parents was at Damon’s funeral. They are the kind of parents a person would pray to belong to. The kind that when I met I let out a sigh of relief that Lindsey would be ok.

I’m not sure why but I constantly tell myself that working with your hands is healthy. It’s what we need to do. It was nearly the only suggestion I had for Lindsey during this time…for situations like this there just aren’t words 99.9% of the time. It’s a space where the friends feel helpless of not knowing what to do or say and the survivor is left helpless…like you’re on two sides of a cliff with no bridge in between. When you can’t talk, or think, or even feel like you can breathe my thinking was just that maybe if you just keep your hands going you could get to the next minute.

Lindsey was left with some pieces of Damon’s furniture and instead of replacing them she and her family renewed them. The furniture is unrecognizable and I will, without bias, say this is one of my favorite makeovers.

Here is the dresser and nightstand before:

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They added pieces of wood to cover the old pattern:

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And here is the after! I love the drawer pulls–it’s so modern.

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This makeover brought tears to my eyes. It’s such a symbol to me that you can’t go back in time. You can’t take things back. You can’t erase memories… but you can change the future. You can renew. You can give hope to lost things. Letting go of that furniture wasn’t going to erase the memory, or take away the pain. It’s a testimony to how Lindsey has chosen to live her life. Yes, I recognize that this is a part of my life but I’m going to own it and control it and breathe my life back into this situation. It may seem like a stretch to look at old furniture this way but we have to stretch. Stretching the mind and heart is what hope and faith are made of.

Lindsey has handled this storm with more grace and strength than I would have dreamed a person could have. From the beginning she has wanted to spread awareness in a hope that others could be spared from tragedy. No human can control anything other than themselves… that’s a tough pill to swallow when our lives are so intertwined with other people and things. Lindsey has been a constant reminder that you will not be able to change your circumstances but you can change yourself within them.

If you or anyone you know has ever felt like things have become too heavy and you don’t know where to turn please reach out to someone. If you feel like you can’t reach out to those you know then call one of the numbers listed on this site. If you are a survivor of suicide and think a support group would help you here is the link to find your local chapter. This site links to things you can do to support or reach out to others for connection!

3 thoughts on “Renewal

  1. Kathy says:

    I remember that sad, sad day when your mom told me about Damen. Even though I didn’t know them, I said many prayers for Lindsey and the families. Now, all I can say is wow and wow! Lindsey did a beautiful job on the furniture, I know it was therapeutic for her. And, you….are a wonderful friend, a great writer, and wise beyond your years. Wow and wow!

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